Beating the Bridge

Today I ran the 27th Annual Beat The Bridge 8-k to support juvenile diabetes research. I don't think I know anyone that's affected by diabetes, so while I can appreciate the cause it's not really personal to me. I really just ran it because it's the start of running season and I've never done an 8-k before. As an fyi - an 8-k is just a hair under 5 miles.

The goal of the actual run is to get over the University Bridge (near UW) before they raise it (it's a drawbridge). This happens at the 2 mile mark and the bridge goes up 20 minutes after the last group (the one I was in) starts. Sadly, or not so sadly, I did not make it across before they raised it. It's sad because I think I was moving at a pretty good pace for me, and if I had started further up in the wave I might have made it. I don't have my timing for it yet, but if my watch is any guide I think I was running somewhere between a 10:00 and 11:00 minute mile. On the other hand, I did get another new t-shirt out of the deal, this time one of those wicking ones that is supposed to be good for running and keeping you dry. It will have to be put into the running shirt rotation now.

I rarely ever run outside, so this was sort of a special treat for me. Usually I'm on a treadmill at the gym watching television and trying to keep up with the belt. If I end up looking at anything it's the people on the treadmill in front of me, which doesn't give you a lot of variety in the scenery. Running outside was a revelation. The last few 5-ks that I've run I was too tired and had to focus too much on just making it through to pay much attention to the scenery. This time, all I really had to focus on was not running too fast and tiring myself out too early, so I had plenty of attention and energy to spare for looking at the water as we ran over the bridges, admiring the trees, watching my fellow racers and smiling at the people lining the streets to cheer us on.

I don't think I've ever come out of a run feeling more energized and proud of myself. I had one goal: finish without stopping or walking when I didn't have to. I stopped once because of the bridge. I have not yet mastered the art of running without some sort of surface under me. That was at mile two and lasted maybe three minutes. Long enough for me to catch my breath a bit but not long enough to really constitute a rest. After mile three I stopped for about 30 seconds to get a drink of water. Some people can run and drink at the same time, but I'm not one of them. That's it. I let hills do the work for me when going down (and got a bit of a speed boost out of it too), and I accepted that I was going to move a little slower going up. When not on a hill of some sort, I tried to keep a steady pace with the occasional speed burst to get around slower runners. At mile three I decided that I was going to push myself for the last mile, and as I rounded the corner and saw the big balloon "4", I sped up to a pace that I thought I could handle for the last mile. In retrospect I think I had a little bit more that I could have left on the field, but there wasn't much and I'm still proud of myself for finishing at the speed I did.

Now, I can't wait for the Seafair 8-k. I know the area that I'll be running in for that one, since it's downtown and I live downtown. Plus, I ran part of the course last year during the 5-k. I may or may not make my goal of doing the half marathon in November in under two hours, but today gave me the confidence that I will be able to finish it and the understanding that when I do I'm going to be proud of myself no matter how long it takes.

By the way, if you have diabetes, know someone that does, or just need a charity to donate some money to (like to get a charitable deduction on your tax return) you can still donate even though the race is over. Just go to my BtB homepage and do what feels natural. I would appreciate it, and so will all of the people that your money goes to to help.

And now... Here they come...

There's an old saying that it's better to be lucky than good. Today I must be very lucky.

In a not so random act of planning I managed to score a free trip back to the native land - Texas, Dallas specifically. I flew in on Saturday night arriving at around 8:30. Since the thing that keeps me up most nights is the house in Las Colinas that I'm still trying to sell (send me a message if you want to see it), it was also my first stop. I didn't go to my hotel; I didn't go get food although I was very hungry. Nope, I went to check on my house and ask it to please find a buyer soon. Like this weekend soon. It didn't answer. My house is kind of snobby like that sometimes. But it's beautiful on the inside, which is where it counts if you listen to people talk about ugly people.

So after hanging out at the house for a while staring at the outside - I couldn't go in since I no longer have keys - I finally went to the hotel and checked in. I'm staying at the Westin Hotel at the Dallas Galleria, a hotel that I've always been sort of curious about. Think about it for a sec. It's a hotel in a mall. It's like it was designed specifically so people could come spend vast amounts of money and pump up the Dallas economy. The room itself is very nice. I think my room is about the same size as my living room and kitchen in Seattle, maybe a little bigger. After checking in I went on the hunt for food. Everything in the mall was closed or closing, so it was up to fast food to save me. One of the places I've missed since moving is Whataburger, so of course that was what I went hunting for. What followed was a half-hour quest through some old haunts to find that most perfect of burgers.

Hunger sated I went back to the hotel and attempted to get comfortable for my stay. Sadly, I'm on west coast time still, and probably will be until just before I go home, which will screw up my first couple of days back there. Wonderful. So I didn't fall asleep until 3:00am, which is a typical time for me since I'm usually up until 1:00ish at home. Then I had to get up at 7:00am to do some work. That's really just not fair. First, it's the weekend. Second, that only gave me four hours of sleep. Third, the one Starbucks in the mall wasn't open yet. I could go on complaining, but I'm just not into it. Without going into any details, the work I did today was a chaotic fiasco. I blame jetlag.

After finishing off my totally frustrating four hours of work, I headed back to my room thinking about what I was going to do about lunch. My normal business travel modus operandi when I'm not actually traveling with co-workers is to basically not eat. I'm hungry enough to do it, but I think I just don't really want to eat alone. You'd think that would help me lose some weight, but it doesn't. Since I'm inclined to not eat alone, I had to come up with a plan so that I had someone to eat with. So I called one of my local friends and had the following approximate conversation:

Me: Hey man, had lunch yet?
Amigo: Not... yet.
Me: You want to go get some lunch with me?
Amigo: Well, I was just about to go to a Stars game.
Me: Oh, well...
Amigo: I have an extra ticket you can have if you want to come.
Me: I'm at the Westin Galleria. It's right at the Galleria mall. I'll set off some fireworks so that you can find me. You know where I am, right? Do you need the address? Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou.

See, I thought I'd seen my last Stars game already. I thought my chances to see the Stars in the AAC were gone and I probably wouldn't be back for them again. If I saw them anywhere it would be in the nearest NHL city to Seattle, which is Vancouver. So I'm thinking about two things: I get to see some hockey and I get to eat arena food. Sweet!

Now, my buddy didn't skimp when it came to purchasing his tickets. He wanted something good, and that's what he got. Great seats about midway up the arena on the front row of the second level just behind and little to the right of the home goal. See the following bit of awesomeness:



What an incredibly good game. My beloved Stars whipped Anaheim's ass 5-2. Stars led 1-0 at the beginning of the third period, and some beautiful plays brought it up to 4-2 when the Ducks' coach said "Your goalie, you will not need him." Hey, thanks coach. That was a nice little empty netter you gave us. Thanks for helping the team pad their stats a little. I told mi amigo at the beginning of the period that while I loved the idea of a shut-out, I'd never seen a shoot-out live before since they changed the rules a couple of years ago. I haven't actually been to a game in three years I think. I went a little nuts while I was there and bought myself a pull-over Stars jacket and a puck. My lifelong ambition is to see an NHL game in every arena and collect a puck to mark my experience. I'm now 2-0 when buying a puck at the game.

I had a great time. I can't believe I was so lucky in my timing. Had I called five minutes later it would have been too late and I'd have had to come up with a backup plan, which would most likely have been to skip lunch and watch TV instead. I did bring some great TV with me - Stargate - but I'm much happier with going to see some hockey than I would have been watching dvds.

Walking, Biking, or Driving

There's a great divide in the city of Seattle. Two of them actually. I imagine it's the same thing in other cities that have a large percentage of people living and working downtown, like New York City. There are basically three types of people downtown on an average work day: drivers, walkers, and bikers.

If you're annoyed that I'm going to talk about walking around town, I've got no problem with you postponing your reading of this post for a while. By all means, do your thing. I'll wait until you're ready again.

Group 1: the Drivers

Drivers, I think, are held in the least respect by the other two groups. I say respect, because there is a serious drive, no pun intended, around here to protect the environment. They are not, however, the most hated. Back to that in a minute.

Drivers clog up the roads. You see them out there blocking lanes of crossing traffic because they think they should get to go anyway. They have to have the police direct traffic because left to their own designs they'll cause nasty gridlock. The worst thing about them is that they have no problem laying on their horns to express their displeasure with the guy in front of them. They do it with their windows up nicely isolated from the majority of the sound without thinking about the walkers right next to them. Then they get pissed when they're told to stop honking. By the way, it's technically illegal around here to blow your horn unless it's an emergency. And by emergency, I don't mean the jackass in front of you isn't moving fast enough.

If they were really serious about reducing traffic downtown, they'd take a look at what they do in London. If you drive in the city centre of London, you pay a toll. Now that I'm not driving, I'm all for that.

I'm going to include the buses in this group. They're just as bad. The passengers aren't, but the bus drivers are. Do not make the mistake of being in the bus lane or stopped to drop someone off very quickly anywhere near the bus stop. The bus drivers have no problem honking at you, and they're not particularly considerate of the poor people naked to their noise either.

Group 2: the Walkers

The walkers are awesome. They are the best people in town. I'm not saying that because I'm one of them. I think there are all sorts of other reasons. Walkers don't clog up the roads. We only add the carbon dioxide produced by our breath to the atmosphere. We're getting some exercise going wherever it is that we're going. In generally, we just totally rock.

Group 3: the Bikers

You might think that Walkers and Bikers are naturally allied against the Drivers, but you would be wrong. Bikers are the least liked people on the road, or the sidewalk, or wherever the hell else they decide to go. I swear when I was a kid one of the things they taught us was that a bike is just like a car and subject to the same rules of the road as any other vehicle. I don't think the bikers around here got the same lesson. If they don't like something on the road, they just hop up onto the sidewalk. They do what they want and and damn everyone else. Then, if they're doing something stupid on the road and almost get squashed, do they own up and take responsibility for their idiocy? Not normally. They will get up in the face of the car that almost turned them into road-kill chew them up one side and down the other. I don't know of anyone in the Walk or Drive groups that likes the Bikers. The worst part is that they can get away with it, since biking is heavily promoted as alternative transportation.

Bikers, you are vehicles, not pedestrians. Follow the rules of the road, and stay on the road. Stay off my sidewalk, I'm walking here.

Walk Like You Drive

This will likely mean nothing to those of you whose primary mode of transportation is not your feet, but feel free to keep reading anyway. As someone coming from a "drive everywhere, all the time" culture who is now living in a "minimize your carbon footprint" culture, I think I have an interesting perspective on one similarity, of a sort, between the two.

In Dallas, I drove everywhere. If I needed to go to the store, I got in the car and went. If I needed to go check the mail, which was a block away, I either waited until I needed to go somewhere else to go get it, or I drove. And I think I was a damn good driver, although I suspect that members of law enforcement would not see it the same way. I drove fast and I had a slashing style. I was the Emmitt Smith of the highways. I don't think I was reckless, but if I needed to pass you, dammit, you were going to get passed. I fit my sporty little Acura through spaces at 80mph that would give little old ladies heart failure. I fondly remember the days of my mother with her foot pressed firmly on her imaginary chicken brake and a death grip on the "oh shit" handle. I don't mind saying that I hit 90 just about every day on my way home from work, and I loved it.

So then I did the unthinkable. I sold my car and moved to a town where 95% of my travel is done by foot. I could take my girlfriend's car, but my apartment is actually closer to work than any reasonably priced parking garage. So, I walk. And I've been doing this walking thing long enough now that I've noticed something. I walk like I used to drive. I walk fast, I cut in and out of crowds. When the light changes at the crosswalks, I'm usually the first one moving, and if I'm not I pass the first mover within a couple of feet. I totally kick ass at this walking thing.

I don't think it's just me either. The people I see ambling along on the sidewalk look like people that would be doing the same thing on the road. And I feel generally the same way about them! They mosey along in what I would consider the left lane of the sidewalk. They're oblivious to people trying to get around them. The ones that aren't oblivious speed up when you try to pass them. There are some that tailgate, which is really disturbing. It's surprising how little people differ between the car and the foot.

Food, Folks, and Fun

I'm such a bum. I haven't updated this thing since, what, April or May. But what do I have to write about? I don't travel for work anymore, so it's not like I have three weeks of adventuring around in a foreign country to talk about.

Speaking of travel, I do have a small trip planned later this month. I'm going back to Dallas for work. I'll tell you right now that I plan on gaining at least five pounds in the three or four days I'm back there. I'm hitting up all of my old favorites. I'm going to gorge myself on Tex-Mex because what they call Tex-Mex here is something that should be punishable by death, or at least a really long prison term. I'm going to have some Tin Star burger tacos. I'm going to go nuts on chips and queso. I'm totally throwing down a whataburger or two. I've lost ten pounds since moving to Seattle, but I'm getting it all back as soon as I get there.

Now, Seattle. I'm starting to notice the same people on my daily walk to and from work. My dad says I live like a yankee now that I never drive. I feel like I should be offended by that, but I'm really not. Anyway, I've started naming these people I see. I suppose I could find out their real names and their stories, but I'm trying to get somewhere and I don't have the time to stop.

First up is Seattle-police-are-communist-guy. He stands at the corner of Pike and 6th Ave every morning, holding his sign and trying to spread the word that Seattle police are communist to the motorists trapped at the light. At least I think that's what he's doing. His accent is so thick that I can't understand a word he says other than his favorite phrase, and that's because someone else translated his muddled words for me. I really think he needs to work on his message. A little help from someone familiar with marketing could help him get his message across better. He's got signage, which is a good start, but he's trying to say way too much with it. I can't get a good read of it, since I don't want to be seen to be reading it and thus invite a conversation, but I'm pretty sure it does mention the Seattle police. However, it also mentions the Pope and sin. I'm not sure how it all fits together.

Next is perhaps my favorite of the Seattle street scene: the Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaal Chaaaaaaaaaaaange guy. Real Change, for those who don't know, is the magazine sold by some people on the street. I don't really think this is an effective way to sell it, but one of the other guys that sells it always says that it's "the homeless newspaper." Not, I think, the best sales technique, but I have to think he's basically right. Back to RC-guy. He's awesome at it. I don't actually know how many papers he sells each day, but I wouldn't be surprised if he was their best salesperson. He doesn't just put it out there and say "buy my magazine" or guilt you into buying with "just trying to get enough for some dinner." No, RC-guy tries to sell you the magazine. He's not playing on sympathy, he's not just begging but trying to give you something in return. He's selling you something. I buy from him every once in a while because I feel like he deserves something for all his hard work. Even better, I don't think he speaks English. He's definitely Hispanic, that much I'm sure of. So, he's doing a killer job selling but he only has two words in his arsenal: Real and Change. I think some of the homeless in Dallas had the same or a similar magazine. They could take lessons from RC-guy.

There are others out there. I could go on for hours about Disheveled-soldier guy, Spare-change-for-food guy, or Tall-hooded-sloucher guy. I'll get around to them some other time.

Do anything fun for New Year's Eve? Lisa and I went to see a Sonics game and we both had a great time. I got to watch some sports, eat some arena food (hot dog, pretzel, etc) and drink some beer. That was only the third pro-basketball I've ever been to. The Sonics are going to be out of here no later than 2009. The owner wants to move them to Oklahoma City of all places. He has to be from there because there's no other reason to move anything to Oklahoma City. It sucks. I think I could actually become a basketball fan if I could go to a few more games. I think going to lots of things is easier when you live downtown. I've gone to the symphony a couple of times. I've been to a Mariners game and a Sonics game. Next football season I'm going to try to go to a Seahawks game. Hopefully they'll play the Cowboys early in the season and I can snag some tickets to see my boys whip up on the hawks. After that damn house of mine sells I'm going to try to take a trip up to Vancouver to catch a Canucks game. Don't they also have a CFL team? That might be good to try too.

One Giant Leap…

I’ve been meaning to write about my trip for a week, but there’s not a whole lot you can say about a three day mad dash across the country, believe it or not. Really, you hop in a car and put the foot to the floor and go from point A to B to C. I will mention a few highlights though.

We only took one detour from our planned route, although in all honesty the route wasn’t that detailed. While we were approaching Amarillo I remembered hearing about the Cadillac Ranch and I wanted to see it. Very disappointing. I was totally expecting a Stonehenge made out of cars – Carhenge, if you will. Sadly it was just 5 Caddys planted facedown in the dirt. There wasn’t anything to it worth talking about really.

I wasn’t all that impressed with Colorado. Mountains are cool, but the mountains in CO didn’t really look like I was expecting. Maybe we weren’t in the skiing mountain part or something. Wyoming may be the worst state ever to drive across. I swear it was like 400 miles of watching paint dry. Or maybe it was only 200 miles. Either way it just wasn’t interesting. Now Utah… Utah had cool scenery. The Great Salt Lake just looked like a big lake, but it had some good rocky mountain areas. Idaho was another snooze-fest. You can’t pump your own gas in Oregon; it’s all full-service gas stations. Washington has cool mountains. Our drive took us past several ski areas. I can’t wait to try those out.

The cats were amazing, btw. The first day we forced them to ride mostly in their cages, but Lisa let Jack out and it turned out to be a good idea. I don’t think he actually swallowed the kitty Prozac I gave him that morning, so he was pretty restless in his cage. Restless Jack = annoying meowing Jack. After that first day we just waited until we were actually on the road to let them out. Merlin would find himself a place on the floorboard in the backseat to curl up and sink into a drug-induced stupor. Jack just made us clear the console in between the front seats for him. He laid there and watched the world go by. I’m amazed that it went as easily as it did.

We’ve been in Seattle for a little over a week now. I’ve never seen so many Starbucks per square mile. We were down in the area called the Retail Core earlier and there was a Starbucks across the street from a Seattle’s Best, which is owned by Starbucks.
I really have been walking everywhere. It’s not too bad. Our temporary housing, which is pretty damn nice, is about a mile from the real downtown area. However, I have walked that distance multiple times per day on some days. I’m wearing out my shoes, legs and back, but I think it’s worth it.

Now, about that temporary housing… We’re in an area called Belltown. It rides right along the side of Elliot Bay, which is very visible from our 25th story apartment. I can spend my day watching the ships go in and out and just generally admire the water. I love living near the water. It’s a one bedroom place that would actually be perfect for all of our stuff if it just had another room tacked on somewhere. We’ve done some apartment hunting, including this building. A decent size apartment for a decent price does not exist here. In Dallas you can usually expect to pay about $1 per square foot. Here it’s more like $2 or maybe a little more. We finally found a place that we like. It’s going to be about 5 blocks from each of our offices – I’ll get to my office situation in a moment – and it’s really a great looking place. It’s tiny though – 900+ square feet but it’s costing us the same as our 2200 sq ft house in Irving.

I think I’ve been very lucky. I’ve been offered and accepted a job with Nordstrom’s Internal Audit department. I think I made the best choice possible in this town as far as both the work and the department itself goes. I arrived in town on Friday 4/13 and I had a job on the following Tuesday. That’s 4 days after I arrived! Who manages to do that? I had a phone interview with Starbucks and was invited in for an in person interview, but although the job sounds pretty interesting I declined the in person interview. I’ve heard a few things about some of the other audit shops around town that make me think that I’ve picked the right group. They sealed the deal on Thursday though. The Nordstrom group does some team building events every once in a while, and it just so happened that they had a trip to see the Seattle Mariners play on Thursday and they invited me to go to it. So after initially declining the invite I came to my senses and joined them. It was lots of fun and, per department policy, they bought me a Mariners hat. And beer. Very nice of them. I’m sure some of my friends would be horrified by the fact that I actually wore it, but the sun was bright and I’m not really a baseball fan anyway so it doesn’t matter.

All in all I have to say I’m pretty satisfied with the choice I’ve made. I miss some things about Texas, mostly people, but this whole Seattle thing is looking like it’s going to be a good experience for me.

Absurd Conversations – Various dates

I feel sort of bad for not posting in a long time. The truth is I haven’t gone anywhere since June, so I haven’t had anything to write. I’ve been trying to think of a way to repurpose my blog so that I post to it at least monthly, and I think I’ve finally figured something out.

Instant messaging creates some entertaining conversations. I’ve decided to post up some of the more interesting ones. They’re interesting to me at least. Names have been changed to protect the innocent.

Modern Geeks

me: what's up PPE?
J: jigga what?
purple python evangelist?
tom brady is addicted to disappointing me
micheal vick keeps doing well, and brady keeps trying to chase his tail
me: he and terrel owens must be in the same support group then.
J: yeah, sounds like to has a bobo
you been taunting tammy over her excellant performance so far this week?
me: bastard. first he sucks, then he gets injured.
i'm savign it for tomorrow when the game is finally over.
J: yeah... and I hear he's not a very nice person
me: i'm hoping her rb actually rushes for negative yards.
J: that'd be hip
like what happened for me
me: i'd really love it if i more than doubled her score rather than almost doubled it.
J: I had a wide receiver go for -1 and another for 2
my Wide receivers are crap
me: good showing
J: my back up ones went for 8 and 0
so the 8 sounds like a keeper, the rest are dead to me
so C has a Wide receiver left to weigh in, I still have my defense and tight end... I think I'm going to get buried
me: i've got to figure out what i'm going to do after next week. TO was already going to be out for week 3 due to bye. but i'm thiking i might need to do something about my TE
J: on the plus side, my reserve players so far have 6 more pts than my actives
me: sweet!
could be a tough game for yoru defense
J: rabble
me: but, it could also be really good. i think your d is stronger than the jak d.
J: heres hoping
me: unfortunately, you have to hope for 6-3 defensive struggle
maybe a couple of touchdowns on fumble recovs and interceptions.
J: hmm... tachyon pulse?
yeah that'd be sweet
me: what you don't want is for pit to have a good passing game.
hmmm, were they trying to repel another ship?
or seal up a rift in the space time continuum
J: it's the voyager response for... wtf? "The tachyon pulse" or when things are extremely dire... "The reverse Tachyon pulse"
me: saw a couple eps of tng on friday. they were from season 1 or 2. almost painful to watch.
J: did you see the last episode of enterprise
it's akin to sliting your wrists and sitting in a bathtub of salty water
me: yeah. i hate to admit, but i watched the whole series
didn't miss an episode.
J: me too... a kind of dirty that doesn't wash off easily
me: it was like a little bit of torture every tues (thurs? fri?) night
like a hangnail. you hate it but you can't stop playing with it.
J: I always downloaded the episodes, I might have seen it once or twice on tv
yeah, or a trainwreck
you know you shouldn't look, but you just can't turn away
me: capt sisko
could not stand watching him.
he seriously couldn't sniff pic's jock as far as captaining something.
J: wow the titans defense scored 0 pts
yeah, ds9 was perhaps my least favorite
me: who got stuck with them?
J: I thought of it as really just a soap opera in space
N (ed. Answer to “who got stuck with them”
p. manning netted him 34 pts... what a load
me: i know.
J: C and I spoke this morning about this... I think I need to make some voodoo dolls
me: A vs J2 has potential to get interesting.
if jags have a good game.
J: rooting for A... that's messed up
:)
my defense and her defense can't both score well can they?
me: like me rooting for J2.
if you get the all field goal game rollign they both can.
J: I had one of those in week 1
me: someone had it this week i think.
kc vs someone?
which means my rb wasn't nearly as impressive as he should have been.
bastard.
supposed to break tackles and head for the endzone.
that's your home
don't you want to go home?
J: my kicker scored me 6 field goals in game 2
game 1 rather
me: nice!
wish mine would do that.
J: I'm eating dried cranberries and watching smallville
god bless america
me: hate college kids. they always have too much freedom.
shouldn't you be grading a paper or something?
J: I missed it so much over the summer... waking up early and everything
me: i've missed it every day since 1992 :(
J: ack
go on paternity leave?
me: would rather just wake up early for work.
J: on the last day have something go wrong and the adoption doesn't go through
how much longer till you move into your house?
me: not this thursday but the next.
J: awesome
me: i know. i'm so ready for the saga to be done with.
J: so do you know anything about los cabos?
me: it got hit by a hurricane earlier this month.
J: shit really?
me: the big brother sequester house was there.
they all had to evacuate.
J: (fiancée) and I just booked a honey moon there for next june
me: to a shitty little development in AZ!
should be fine in june.
all inclusive resort?
J: yup
me: sweet!
J: yeah I'm looking forward to it
we almost booked a cruise in the worlds largest cruise ship, but I think that will just have to wait till another day
it just went into service in may... they don't even have pictures of the stinking thing yet
me: i've heard about that one. i think they have a thing on it where you can go surfing.
like up where the rock climbing wall normally is.
J: yup
I've watched the documentary about building the thing
a couple of times...
me: hmm. need to see that.
J: I've never been on a cruise though
me: i've been on one. i loved it. it was a 3 night thing. we're going on a 7 day one in december.
try the royal carrib out of galveston to cozumel.
it was pretty cheap too.
for a vacation.
J: I think I need to lose some weight before I go on a cruise
me: amazing food. 5 star dining every night, and it's included as part of the package.
J: I could totally put on a winter coat after a week of all you can eat
me: you wouldn't be the biggest one there.
J: I might leave that way though
I have dedication and the will of the warrior
I went to an asian market yesterday, they had "Double York" eggs... I took a picture with my camera while (fiancee) was telling me I was making a scene
me: that's funny.
send it to jay?
J: do you know her cell phone number?
me: jay leno? i'm pretty sure it's unlisted.
J: ah I thought you meant (co-worker)
I went to a pho place... it was pretty good
me: what kind of food is that?
J: vietnamese soup
the kind I had was chicken curry or something like that
I think usually pho is a beef soup
me: ugh. i hate curry.
J: poor lil feller
thai curry is good stuff
me: if you like nuclear weapons going off in your mouth, i'm sure it is.
J: well I've dabbled with hot... I tried the spicy diet
a stunning failure
thai curry they mix with coconut milk and then put some chicken and veggies in it... I like adding white rice till it's less like soup and more the consistency of something like mashed potatoes
the curry comes out a little sweet, it's good stuff
one time I had some very spicy wings at buffalo wild wings... and then I drank too much... and then my sinuses got to "enjoy" some very spicy wings as they made their way back into the lime light
me: ouch
that just makes me want to cry
J: didn't exactly thrill me
J: so are you headed to canadia?
me: no. i'm done for the year. i'm working on my own project while they're gone. they're in to their 2nd week of the audit right now.
J: ah nice
Back when I was your age... Pluto was a planet
me: and when i drove i had to steer too!
J: best pickup line ever... "Hey does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"
and the best christmas movie is still bad santa
you should check out santa's slay though
me: next time (gf) is out of town i'm all over it.
J: you have seen bad santa right?
me: yeah. good movie. not as good as christmas vacation.
J: must be a generation gap type thing ;)
me: is taht what you guys are?
i know G and i are both gen-x
if you can believe that
J: well that explains why both of you are delusional about christmas movies
me: #2 is xmas story
everything after that is just filler
snap into a slim jim!
J: G actually came up in conversation during class the other day
was kinda weird
me: (previous company named)?
J: yeah
me: did you name drop?
i would have
J: someone asked if people who blow the whistle are employable... prof mentioned that the head person from (previous co) stuff is doing speaches now, but that G was there and is now working for (current co)
well it was in the class, the one I'm a ta for, so the professor already knows I worked with him
me: yeah, but the other students don't necessarily
you had scoreboard and you didn't point it out.
J: I was enjoying the story, didn't want to interupt, I still don't really know much about what G did there with regards to the hunting
me: he was a manager.
which means he may or may not have done any actual work himself.
if it's like here, he did.
shutting down now. talk to you later.
J: see ya cheif


The War with Dept X

Day 1
J2 says: Are they being nice to you?
Me says: who? Dept X? as nice as they usually are. which is to say they constantly have a look that seems to say "why are you talking? can't you tell it bothers me?"
J2 says: I wonder if we can re-outsource them?
Me says: screw that. let's just invade and pillage them. teach them a lesson. show them who's boss.
J2 says: I agree. You and S start the assult and we will reinforce you when we get back.
Me says: between S and i there won't be anything left for the rest of you.
J2 says: That's the spirit! Remind me to give you a sticker when I get back!

Day 2
J2 says: How goes the battle with Dept X?
Me says: they recruited mercenaries to fight with them (Dept Y). We tried to go for the quick win yesterday with a strong frontal assualt but they beat us back. Many casualties on both sides. I think S broke a nail. We're going to try using J3 in a feint today and go for a flanking attack. Bringing in Dept Y may have postponed their inevitable defeat for a little while, but they will crumble before us yet.
J2 says: I will bring in the big artillary-the Trebuchet, when we get back.
Me says: we interviewed on of the analysts down there for the spot we had open up here. i think we can turn her and have a spy in their midst. I plan on having this war wrapped up long before you return.
J2 says: What methods of introgration did you employ?
Me says: chinese water torture and country music
Me says: the water torture didn't bother her but she cracked like a rotten egg after the 70th listen to "Achy Breaky Heart"
J2 says: Very good.

Day 3
Me says: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that in a daring, early hour op S captured Opal (ed. Dept X leader). We’ve converted your cube into a cell for her and she’s currently being interrogated. With their leader cut off, it’s only a matter of time before they fall into disarry. They’re holed up in their cubes in a defensive posture now. One thing I didn’t count on was D (ed. Consultants). I knew they were working together, but I expected that D would play Switzerland and sit this one out. No such luck. Fortunately, they’re poorly organized and supplied.
Me says: Now the bad news. We lost J3 yesterday. He tried to go over the wall to clear out a nest of holdouts and open up some lanes for attacking. Unfortunately he ran into T. She’s a demon! The atrocities she committed on him are going to be infamous. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get the image of his mutilated body out of my mind.
J2 says: It was good of him to take one for the team.
Me says: he was a good soldier
J2 says: We will enjoy a beer in his honor!
Me says: and tell lies about women!
J2 says: I will have J4 go up the week after next and put the hurt on T. We will have revenge!


Additionally, I’m going to try to make it a regular feature to include a slang “word of the post”. It will do two things.
1. Entertain me
2. Help me get a few funny slang words to help me entertain others.

This entry’s Word of the Post, courtesy of www.urbandictionary.com , is

Dutch Oven - to fart under covers and then pull the covers over your or someone else’s head

Bella Firenze – June 24-25

Since nothing ever goes as planned, it’s fitting that something went wrong first thing in the morning. I was the one who purchased our tickets to Florence – “dad” and I went together – and somehow I ended up purchasing tickets on two different trains. One left at 9:00 and the other left at 10:00. Luckily, even though my f-up was going to cost us at least an hour of exploring, he’s a pretty laid back guy and didn’t give me any of the grief I deserved from it. I took the 9:00 train and he took the 10:00.

The ride was nice. We went through some very pretty country, including some mountains. Well, they were either mountains or just very tall hills. I was quite impressed actually. It was the kind of scenery you only see in movies. It was a long ride though – 2 hours and 45 minutes. I read and listened to the iPod throughout. I’ve never been a huge music fan, but that little gadget is one of the best purchases I’ve ever made. It’s like it provides a soundtrack for your life.

I got off the train in Florence and looked around the station for a bit. I didn’t really have to wait a full hour for him to arrive since my train was a little late anyway. I spotted our stop for lunch immediately and bought a map of the city from the tourism office. Then I sat down to study the map and wait. After a while his train showed up. I’m standing there waiting for him at the top of the platform when I notice this older, blonde guy with his shirt unbuttoned down to middle of his chest walking down from where he got off the train. I thought the guy looked incredibly familiar, but I wasn’t sure if he was who I thought he was until some Italian guy next to me started shouting “Great performance. Sting! Great performance!” He sort of smiled vaguely and gave a half-wave, but he looked like he didn’t really want to be bothered. I left him alone. He walked by me no more than five feet away. My second celebrity encounter; the first was in December. I swear Sting is following me. I’m being stalked by a rock star! Cool.

Lunch was at the train station McDonald’s. I haven’t had the Micky D’s since I got here, so I was eager to give it a shot. Plus, I was so hungry I would have eaten fresh road-kill, or track-kill, if someone offered it to me. I’d have even paid.

After lunch we started planning out what we wanted to see and where we wanted to go. There were two items on the must list and everything else was pretty flexible. The plan was to start out and head north to the Galleria dell’Accademia to see “David” and work our way south. It was just a plan, but it was a plan that was going to take a lot of walking. We stepped out of the train station, and I looked over at the bus stop and saw the CitySightseeing tour bus. I’ve never been on one of them, but Lisa did it in London and she loved it. That was a pretty good recommendation to me, so I mentioned that I’d heard they were a great way to see the city and that we should check out their itinerary. Everything we wanted to see and more was on there, so we handed over our 20 euros and climbed on board.

The bus has two lines: A and B. We were limited both in the time we had available to spend in Florence (roughly 8 hours) and the closing time of the bus tour. There was apparently some sort of fireworks show happening that night in Florence and the bus line was going to do the last run at 7:00 rather than stay open until midnight. Incidentally, there was also a fireworks show in Milan that night, although it appears that I’m the only one in my group that realizes it, including the native. I hope I wasn’t imagining those sounds. Going to a mental hospital for a couple of weeks sounds restful, but I really don’t want to actually be a nut. Since we were limited, we chose the A line which stayed mostly in the heart of the city, which was fine with us since that’s where everything we wanted to see was anyway.

The first time we got off the bus was near the Arno River. We’d spotted the river going through and wanted a closer look, so we hopped off the bus and walked a block to the river. I got a few good pictures of the river and Ponte Vecchio. We crossed the bridge and walked down along the banks to Ponte Vecchio. Ponte Vecchio is, I think, a pretty famous bridge in Florence. Most of the city’s best goldsmith’s have their shops there, and really it doesn’t look anything like a bridge to me. It looks like a large set of townhomes built across the river. Very strange and very crowded. From there we walked over to the Galleria degli Uffizi and the plaza outside of it. There was some great sculpture there, including a replica of “David” and a very nice one of Neptune. I hate to say it, but although I was extremely impressed by “David” I liked the Neptune one far more. There was something regal about it that I didn’t feel from “David”.



I almost got run over by a horse and carriage while taking pictures of the statues and all the buildings. I was backing up to try to get this old church completely in frame when I heard the clip-clop of a horse’s feet. I turned around and there he was with his driver grinning maniacally. Ok, the driver wasn’t really doing that, and I think he was trying to turn the horse so it didn’t run me down, but it paints a more interesting picture that way.



From Uffizi we headed back to the bus stop. We passed another building with a series of sculptures inside and stopped to look. I’m not sure if the building or any of the sculptures were anything famous though. Once on the bus we headed to the Piazzale Michelangelo, which is supposed to have one of the best views of Florence. Unfortunately, thanks to the fireworks show we weren’t able to get the best views. Most of the Piazzale was closed off and the police guarding it didn’t look like the forgiving types.

Back on the bus, we went through some interesting neighborhoods and passed the museum where some of Galileo’s telescopes are housed. I’m kind of sorry we didn’t go in to that one. We rode the bus and listened to the tour all the way back to the train station. From there we had two plans, either of which would have worked for us. Plan A was to wait for the bus from the next line to show up and take that tour. Plan B was to wait for the bus we were just on to start moving again and go visit the Galleria Accademia to see David. We opted with Plan B, so we had some time to kill. We decided to up to this item that was on the map but not near any of the tour stops, the Fortezza Da Basso. On the walk over there we decided to cause an international incident by walking through a restricted area. Ok, I guess it wasn’t really all that bad, but we did get stopped by a security guard who told us that way we were going was not for tourists and for Congress only. Shame on us. Eventually we made it over to the Fortezza, but there was some sort of show going on so we couldn’t go in. I’m not all that disappointed actually. If I’m going to look at forts, I’d rather look at castles and such in Germany or Spain. A fort in Italy, even an old fort, doesn’t hold that much appeal for me.

We made our final stop of the day at the Galleria and stood in line to get in. All the guidebooks I’ve read say that the lines to get in are very long, so you should make a reservation. I’d prefer not to be locked in to certain times, so of course I never make reservations. That kept me from seeing the Last Supper, but it didn’t keep me from David. We waited maybe half an hour before getting inside, which I didn’t think was too bad. Then we had to go through a metal detector. Some deranged art critic tried to take a hammer to David in 1991, so now everyone has to pass through the metal detector and there’s a plexiglass barrier around the sculpture.

Florence is a great place for art lovers, but only if you’re really into Renaissance style paintings and sculpture. I’m not. I can appreciate the mastery of the art form by Da Vinci, Michelangelo, Donatello, etc. – what’s the other TMN Turtle’s name? – but the work itself doesn’t speak to me. I can only take looking at it for a couple of seconds. Put me in front of a Matisse or Picasso and I can hang for a while, but Renaissance art sort of falls on deaf eyes. That being said, David is a pretty awesome piece of work. It’s huge! Easily 20 feet tall not counting the base, which must add another 5 or 6 feet on to that. It’s also very detailed. You can see the veins and tendons in his hands and pick out individual muscles. A definite must see if you find yourself in Florence.

After abandoning the Galleria we walked about a quarter of a mile down the street to the Duomo. I really like this one. Its façade is very different from the cathedrals in London, York, and even Milan. This one looks like something more out a storybook. I wish we had gone in. The innards of a cathedral are usually just as interesting as the outside.



That was it for us. The city was about to close down for the fireworks, and we were both hot, nasty, and tired. I was also sporting a seriously impressive sunburn. We caught the bus back to the train station, changed our reservations to an earlier train, stopped by McD’s for dinner and headed back to Milan. I slept most of the way – well, dozed actually. I doubt anyone can actually sleep on a train unless they’ve got one of the sleeper cars.

Sunday was a day of rest, and by that I mean I didn’t leave the hotel until dinner at 7:45. I actually only left my room once and that was for the five minutes it took for me to go up the executive lounge and snag a couple of bottles of water and a Pepsi to go along with my lunch. I should have gotten out and done a little souvenir shopping, but I didn’t. Oh, well. I’ll find something sometime before I leave.

Return of Ugly Naked Guy and Sting! – June 20-23

The work week went through with no real excitement. Working internationally is a lot like working in the home office, I just happen to be in a different country.

Like I said, the week was pretty unexciting, until Friday that is. Friday at lunch we were sitting there in the cafeteria talking about American television with our Italian translator. CSI is very popular here. So is Lost. The Sopranos is just starting up, which is weird since it’s been around 10 or so years at home. All of the sudden there’s a commotion at the table next to us. Everybody was turning around to look up and out the window and there were a lot of exclamations of surprise and laughing. So I turned around to see what all the commotion was about. I mostly saw sky until I looked at the apartment building next door. There was a guy standing out on his balcony with a newspaper in his tidy whities. I think he’d noticed everyone looking at him because he was looking back at us. But there he was, hanging out on his balcony in his underwear. And lest you think this was some beautiful Neapolitan god hanging out in his underwear, this guy was more of the fat and hairy version than the slim and suave type. It was a good laugh.

I found out on Friday at that same lunch that Sting was going to be in town playing at the plaza around the Duomo. I debated going for a long time, but in the end it was one of those things where you have to say that this is a once in a lifetime opportunity and you’d be an idiot to pass it up. So around 9:00, after dinner, I and “dad” caught the subway down to downtown. The plaza was insanely crowded. I couldn’t being to estimate the number of people there, but it was more than 10 and probably less than 100,000. We had to sit through three songs from some random Italian band. I have no idea if they were good or not, since it all sounded pretty jumbled to me. After that we had to sit through an interview with them and them a whole bunch of excerpts from Sting interviews while his roadies set up the stage. Then he got on. We only stayed to listen to three songs, one of which was Message in a Bottle. I don’t know what the other two were even though I was familiar with the songs. It was really crowded and I couldn’t see anything, so we decided to take off. Besides, I needed to catch some sleep before we trained off to Florence.

Padre e Figlio – Last Saturday

I just remembered something that happened to me on Saturday that I didn’t put in my update. When we got out of the subway station at il Duomo, we were immediately stopped by some African guy that wanted to give us “friendship” bracelets. I eventually got one because another guy later wouldn’t leave me alone and he was willing to keep walking and tying while I walked away. He got no euros out of me. Anyway, this first guy hounded us for a couple of minute telling us that it was free and it was just for friendship. Whatever.

I’m traveling with two other guys. One of them is in his late 50s or maybe his 60s. I don’t know which. I’m told he’s actually not as old as he looks, but I just find it hard to believe. The other guy is maybe a couple of years older than me. I’ll put the upper limit of his age at 37, and that’s pushing it. So the African guy finally lost us completely when he asked if I wanted a bracelet for me and my father. First of all, what self-respecting 30-something gets matching thread bracelets with his father, in any culture? Second, you might think he was talking about the older guy with me, but you’d be wrong. He was actually calling the guy that’s just a couple of years older my father. He said we look alike. I don’t see it, but maybe that was just his pitch. At first I just felt incredulous that he thought we were that far apart in age. I know I don’t look 33, but I didn’t think I looked like a teenager. I don’t get carded when I go for a drink anymore, so I must look at least older than 25. And “dad” doesn’t look all that old either. Like I said, the upper limit of his age is 37, and I know that would be too high. After getting over the incredulous feeling I started calling him dad, but only for a few minutes. I don’t want to rub something like that in too much.

Um… Did the power go out? – June 19

Ok, so it’s not really normal for me to post an entry for a single day. Not enough interesting happens every day on one of these trips. It’s usually the same old routine: get up, shower, go to work, work/lunch/work with liberal surfing inserted randomly (or maybe it’s intense work inserted randomly into the liberal surfing), back to hotel, 2-hour dinner, talk to family, go to bed. Lather, rinse, repeat. But tonight, something a little more interesting happened.

Let’s not get too overtly specific about things, but I was in the bathroom. The door was closed and there I was doing my thing when I hear this loud popping sound right outside the bathroom door and the lights all go out. Of course there’s no window in the bathroom either. It’s on the hall side of the room rather than the outside world side. Good thing I had my cell phone in my pocket or I wouldn’t have been able to see anything. Unfortunately, it didn’t provide enough light for me to get situated to go out in the room area and figure out what the hell was going on, so I fumbled around and got the door opened. I finished doing my business, washed my hands (VERY important, too many people don’t recognize the importance of a little soap and water after any kind of bathroom event) and went out to start flipping switches. I flipped the ones next to the bathroom off and on again a couple of times, nothing happened. I went over to the bed and flipped the switches there a couple of times, still nothing. Finally, I gave in and called the front desk to ask if there was a problem. They said that someone would be right up to look at things. A couple of seconds later, no more than 30 max, the lights all just popped on again. So I called the front desk and told them not to bother sending anyone, everything was apparently cool. They said “ok, thanks” and hung up. I put the phone down, and the lights went out so fast it was almost like they were connected to the handset. So I called the front desk again and asked them to send someone up anyway. Hang up, lights on. Grrrr.

After a couple of minutes, the Mr. Fixit guy shows up. All the lights are off at this point and I’m wandering around in the dark because I’m not smart enough to open up the drapes and let a little natural light in. As soon as I open up the door, the lights come on. He tells me to put the key in the slot next to the door, which I haven’t had to do for the entire first week, and says that it has to be there all the time for the lights to work. Shut door, lights stay on. I pull out the card, and the lights stay on… for just long enough for me to get across the room to the desk and sit down. Then they turned off. So I went back over and stuck the key in the door. Everyone’s happy now that I’ve got the key in the slot. The lights are happy because they have something that says “this room is occupied.” I’m happy because the lights are happy, and I should remain that way until the time comes that I forget to take the key with me when I leave. That’ll probably be tomorrow.

Milan in a day - June 17-18

Much like the title says, I saw pretty much all I wanted and was able to see of Milan in just one day. Significantly less then a full day actually, but what I saw was pretty damn cool.

Being Saturday, my coworkers and I all decided to sleep in a little bit. I hadn’t really planned on having company while I toured, but I’m a flexible kind of guy, and they were willing to go places I suggested, so we got along just fine. The first stop was the Metro station to get a ticket for the subway, underground, metro, whatever it’s called here. There was a little confusion there. First we wanted to buy tickets at the electronic kiosk, but we couldn’t make it speak English. Then there was confusion caused by the person selling the tickets who said that you could only get an all-day pass at the next station up the line. Then he reversed himself when I asked for a ticket to that station. Finally, we got tickets, and proceeded to the next challenge: figuring out which train we needed to take to get down to il Duomo station, which is conveniently located in the plaza right in front of one of Milan’s two most visited tourist sites.

Il Duomo is a fairly large cathedral, and it’s very intricate. There are lots of little carvings on the towers, of which there are over 100 I believe. I think that’s what I read. We walked through the inside. It wasn’t as crowded with monuments and other bric-a-brac as St. Edwards in London or the York Minster, but there was a significant portion of unused space. For such a large building it was actually a pretty small church. The inside was dark, and even after I’d finally figured out why my camera was taking such bad pics and changing the settings a little bit, none of them came out all that great. The flash just didn’t light things up very well. We walked around the inside for about half and hour or 45 minutes being nasty tourists and taking pictures, which I’m sure disturbed the worshippers. If I were one of them I’d be annoyed that these people were trampling through my holy place and taking pictures. I think everybody was being respectful, but you know there’s going to be someone who’s not.

After walking around the inside, we did a quick walk around the outside to take some more shots and then coughed up our four euros each to climb the steps to the roof. It’s free to get in, but you have to pay 4-6 to climb on top of it. In retrospect, it might have been worth it to pay the extra two euros to take the elevator. The steps went on so long that I kind of wondered if I’d died and this was my punishment. Once up top it was all worth it. I have some pictures, which I may put up at some point, but probably won’t. If you’re interested, let me know and I’ll send you some. The top of the Duomo was pretty cool. You get to see the tower carvings closer up, but that’s not really the coolest thing about it. It’s just the way it looks, like it’s out of some sort of fairy tale or something. It all looked very delicate and very cool. We stayed up there for an hour or so just looking around and taking pictures. Rather than climb down we decided to be dishonest and take the elevator. Really though, it makes sense. Make everyone pay to climb – that way they get their exercise – and let everyone take the elevator down. This will prevent some of the backups on the stairs that we had to endure on the way up.

After we got down it was time for a nice bottle of water and some food. So we wandered around a bit looking for a bite and finally settled in this nice little outdoor café where no one spoke a word of English. We had a nice leisurely lunch and I said something about seeing the Parlour of Milan, which everyone sort of agreed to. Truth to tell it was right over by our subway stop, which I knew full well. There’s a fountain area outside the parlour with lots and lots of pigeons. I started walking away from the parlour toward the fountain t get a good look, and picture, of the building. So while I’m there these two guys grab my hand and put birdseed in them. Now I’m covered in pigeons. I had two thoughts going through my head. Thought 1: bird flu. Thought 2: Please don’t let these filthy beasts crap on me. Then these guys start hassling me for money. Apparently the little bit of birdseed and corn pieces they put in my hand warranted 5 euros each. That’s what they thought at least. I didn’t want to argue that much, but I’m not paying that much for the honor of having a bird on my hand. Certainly not when their cost of sales on that one couldn’t amount to more than a couple of cents each. I gave them each two and walked away. Actually, I gave one guy four and let the other guy hassle him about it. That way I only ended up paying $5 to make them go away and guy two was so busy hassling guy one for his share of the take that he let me go without saying anything. I am smart. S-M-R-T.

We stopped at a souvenir stand and I saw a paperweight of the Castello Sforenzo, which was tentatively on my list of things to see. I made a quick suggestion, figured out which stop we needed to get off at and we headed on our way. The castle wasn’t terribly impressive, but I’m glad I went. I like castles almost as much as I like cathedrals. We skipped all the castle museums and just walked around the place a little bit.

After that it was time to try to find the grand-daddy of all interesting things in Milan and probably the hardest to get in to see. It was also the one item on my list that I was least likely to get to see: Leonardo DaVinci’s “Last Supper”. The train stop was only the next one up the line, so we decided to hoof it. We walked, and walked, and walked, and walked. We had a map, but not knowing the lay of the land and me not being a boy scount, it was hard to tell which way was east, west, north, or south. So we’d compare the map to street names to see if we were going in the right direction, which seems logical. I only saw one street name on both the map and the street the entire time until we finally gave up and asked a couple of passing ladies where the Ultima Cena was. Of course I’d led us in the wrong direction. If I say “trust me” about a direction, do yourself a favor and go the opposite way. Well, we found the church where the last supper is, but we didn’t actually get in to see it. There were no tickets available until the end of July. I knew I was going to be here well in advance. I wonder why I didn’t book a spot when I had the chance.

Slightly disappointed, we made our way by foot and train back to the hotel. Sunday was a day of rest. We all stuck to ourselves except for dinner. I pretty much stayed in my room the whole day and read. I’d like to say I did something useful, like CPA studying or something like that, but no, I read. It was a good book, too. I’m pretty glad I did it.

So next weekend I’m considering going to Florence. It’s only a 2-3.5 hour train ride. Tickets appear to cost 28 euros in both directions. I can leave to go at 9am and come back on the 9pm train, which would get me back to the hotel around midnight. I don’t have a whole lot longer to think about it. I’ll probably need to book my reservation no later than Wednesday. At this point though, it’s looking pretty good.

When the moon hits your eye... - June 12-16

Well, after getting a good night’s sleep after my harrowing 17-hour journey from Dallas to Milan, I’m almost, sort of, kind of, maybe ready for work. I’m not committing to anything though.

The week went well, I suppose, considering that once I got here I really didn’t want to be here. I usually feel like I wish I was home when I’m on these trips, but there was more to it this week. Perhaps it was the jet-lag. I was told it would probably catch up to me by Wednesday, but maybe I was experiencing little problems with it throughout the week, culminating with a BIG finish on Thursday. That’s when the jet-lag really reached up and smacked me. Anyway, despite my fatigue and my desire to be someplace else, home, I did get some work done. Probably not as much as I could have, but any little bit of work I get done in week one is work that I don’t have to do in week two.

I’ll mention a couple of things here. Milan is not the prettiest place in the country. Most of the residents have told me that there’s not really a whole lot to see here and that I should probably go visit Venice or Florence on the weekend. Now, that could just be a case of familiarity breeding contempt, but they’re not the only ones that say that. I bought “Italy for Dummies” before I left, and there’s not a whole lot in there about Milan. It’s the financial capital of Italy. It’s the fashion capital, too. In fact, someone said that our last week here is supposed to be fashion week. Someone else also said that fashion week isn’t until August, which makes both a little sense and no sense at all. August is typically vacation month – they say everything shuts down except for things like video and grocery stores. So it would be good for fashion week to be here in August because no one else is. On the other hand, no one’s here! Why would you hold a fashion show in a place where no one was at? See makes perfect sense and no sense at all. That being said, there are a few things out there to see, and I got a brief glimpse of them on Wednesday night. More on that later.

I usually include some sort of commentary on the drivers. I don’t know if I do it intentionally, but I will this time. I was told that driving in Milan was more scary than driving in London, Buenos Aires, or Mexico City. Wrong! Driving in Milan is actually almost sane. They’re reasonably courteous to the other cars, although there is still a sort of “me first” attitude like there have been in all the other places I’ve been. Actually, we kind of have that attitude in Dallas if you look at it. We’re always cutting each other off. Then there are the bikers. I’m going to lump all people that ride motorized two-wheel vehicles under this class. There are some bicyclers, but there are so few and they’re so slow that they don’t really count. In the states, at least in Texas, motorcycle riders have to be extra careful about their surroundings. We live in the land of big cars. It’s hard to see a motorcycle when you’re up in a Hummer. That’s not the case here. I haven’t seen anything bigger than your standard mini-van and very few of those. Most cars around here are probably the size of Honda Civics or Ford Focuses. They have some that are much smaller, like half the size of a Focus, called a Smart car. Wonder when those will make it to America. Anyway, they’re on the same level as the bikers, so that helps. What really helps is the sheer number of bikers. Ok, maybe you could miss the bike ahead of you, but there’s no way you could miss it, the one behind you, the one passing you on the left and the one passing you on the right. And you definitely wouldn’t miss the one that slipped in between you and the car in front of you while you were stopped at the light! I feel like the bikers are like that guy on the bridge in Spiderman who told the Green Goblin that if he messed with one he messed with all of them.

So Wednesday we went downtown to where all the touristy stuff is. I don’t really know why, since I was already planning on going down there over the weekend. We saw il Duomo and the Parlour of Milan. We had dinner outdoors at this little restaurant. More of our dinners have been outside than inside. The weather is perfect for that. I wouldn’t even consider having an 8:00 dinner outside at home. That’s just crazy talk. Anyway, I’ll revisit the tourist stuff in another entry. The sights deserve some love of their own.

Per piacere e grazie – June 10-11

I am now resting and relaxing in Milan. Or maybe not resting or relaxing, but I am in Milan.

I was a complete moron when planning this trip. I listened to people I shouldn’t have and planned my trip based on their recommendations and advice when I could have saved myself a lot of time and aggravation if I’d just done my research and planned my own trip. I’m so lazy that way. I let other people tell me how I should get somewhere all the time rather than put in a little effort and save myself some trouble later. Anyway, I made it to Milan just fine, and – ginormous surprise – so did my luggage.

The first leg of my trip took me from DFW to O’Hare. That wasn’t too bad. It’s only a four-hour flight. This was the first time I’d ever been to O’Hare airport. I’ve been to Chicago many times – I used to have family that lives there. I got off the plane and started to make my way to the next gate for my connecting flight to London. Turns out there’s a problem with the plane and the flight has been delayed for about 40 minutes. That’s not too bad, at least it means that I won’t have as long of a layover in Heathrow.

So, thinking I had all the time in the world I made my way toward the gate and stopped to get some McDonald’s and a Cinnabon. I love Cinnabons. They’re wonderful. You’ve got doughy bread, sweet sugar, and, the most important part, cinnamon. I had my lunch and wandered over to the gate. After sitting there for a while wishing I could find an outlet near a chair so that I could whip out my computer, I put on my iPod and began to listen to an audiobook. I pulled out a headphone every once in a while when I thought I heard the check-in people say something interesting. They said the plane would be delayed even longer, like until 7:00 or so, so I put the headphones on and stopped paying attention. That was almost a big mistake. After a while I looked up and noticed a bunch of people lining up in front of MY gate. I went over and discovered that they had been boarding for the last couple of minutes. First and Business were already on board, as well as most of the groups. Well, I joined right in and got up to the head of the line. Unfortunately, it seemed that my ticket was no good and I had to go to the desk and get my new ticket.

I got bumped from Business class… Bumped UP! I made the trip from Chicago to London in style! The seat was spacious. First class holds a maximum of 16 people. The seats lay down flat so that you’re laying down rather than reclining. Very nice. I wonder why I got moved to First instead of someone else. I’m sure there was someone else on the plane that would have been ahead of me in points. Never look a gift-horse in the mouth, the saying goes. I just sat back and enjoyed it all the way across the ocean.

Once in London I swiftly made my way to the Admiral’s Club, or the BA equivalent that is, cursing my phone and T-Mobile all the way. I went out of my way to purchase a phone that would work internationally and gone ahead and paid the extra $20 per month so that I would still be able to send and receive email while I’m in a foreign country, and the damn phone wouldn’t work! No matter how many times I turned it on and off, it still wouldn’t connect to any service, and I know that UK has T-mobile. I almost bought an extra phone from one of the stores there last time I was there just so I would have something that worked.

After relaxing in the club for two hours or so, I finally got to get on with the last leg of my journey. A quick four hours later in what basically amounted to the first-class cabin of a SWA jet and I was in Milan, dirty and dead tired. I fell asleep several times on the way to the hotel, and I don’t think the driver appreciated it too much. Every time I started to nod off he would pick up his cell and call someone, or there was suddenly something he had to listen to louder on the radio, or he would hit the brakes a little harder. He just did something to wake me up.

I got into my room at the hotel and immediately hated it. I had no decent ‘net connection, and that’s vital to me. The room was dark and smelly. I had a lovely view of the roof of the lobby area. It was just a bad room. I stuck with it for about half an hour before I called the front desk and asked them to change me to a different room. And what a difference that makes. It’s no bigger, but it feels lighter. I have a better view, although there’s really not a whole lot to see on this side of town. I guess the connection strength of the ‘net (it’s all wireless, which they tell me I can use anywhere in the hotel) connection gets better the higher you go. I’m just generally happier with it. So, I’m in, I’ve showered (and that’s something everyone around

Whoa Mexico – April-May 2006

Since around mid-April, I have basically been immersed in Mexican culture.

It started off with a trip with Lisa to Puerta Vallarta. Man, I miss that. Beautiful hotel, beautiful pool, and any place with a beach has got to be good. We spent four heavenly days relaxing by the pool and sipping on froo-froo drinks. We only ventured out once and that was to take a guided tour of the city. That was nice. We saw the cathedral of Maria de Guadalupe, had lunch in the mountains at some place near where they filmed Predator, and took a tour of a tequila factory. Mosty, we just sat by the pool and read. We hopped in every once in a while, but it was mostly just sitting next to it. After dinner every night we kicked off shoes and took a walk along the beach, and then we went back up to the room and sat on the balcony and watched the pool and the ocean. We got a fireworks show every night from this returning pirate ship show that’s offered as an excursion through the hotel concierge. I think they serve other hotels in the area and the cruise ships too. I think it would be hard for the pirates to make a living just off of our little hotel.

Speaking of the hotel, it was by far one of the nicest I’ve ever been in. It was definitely the nicest oceanfront hotel I’ve stayed in. One thing they did that I really liked is have tile everywhere. Most hotels you go into have carpeting in the rooms. That’s great if you’re staying in Dallas or some other landlocked city, but when you’ve got people tracking in sand from the beach, the carpets tend to get a little funky. And they always feel wet thanks to the humidity and wet feet. No, tile is the way to go. It was also very open. The rooms were all air conditioned, but the halls were open to the outside. They were still inside, though. I don’t want anyone to get the impression that this was like a Motel 6 or something. It was an enclosed building with a roof and everything, but the ground floor was left open to the outside, and it really added something to the overall atmosphere. That and the fountain and glass elevators. I really miss Puerta Vallarta. The only complaint about the trip that I could possibly make wouldn’t actually be valid since I knew what to expect before I got there. The water in the ocean wasn’t the crystal clear blue that you could get in the Caribbean or even on the other side of the bay. Sadly, it was a muddy brown type water with poor visibility. That was really ok with me though. I’m not really all that keen on going into the ocean, so I was more than content just to swim in the pool. You rarely ever find swimming pool sharks, and with all the chlorine in pool water you can feel safe that no germ can survive too long. My advice: book yourself to the Puerta Vallarta Marriott as soon as possible.

So that was my first visit to Mexico. I’d also say that it’s my best visit to Mexico. I’ve been to other towns before, but that was the best trip.

Since PV I have spent two weeks in Mexico City for work. My report on Mexico City is both good and bad. The good: it’s very pretty. There are a lot of trees there, more than I ever expected to find in a city. Really, I thought all cities pretty much looked like Dallas, New York or London: concrete jungles. Mexico City is most definitely not like that. It looks more like a jungle with concrete growing out of it. There are trees everywhere, and lots of very nice looking parks. Every day when we’re going back from the office to the hotel we pass a group of people, mostly men or boys, playing futbol in the park. They look like they’re having a lot of fun. We’re also staying in a fairly nice part of town, with a Starbucks just about a block away. I’ve decided that the mark of a good hotel is that there is a Starbucks nearby or one actually in the hotel. If the hotel serves Starbucks coffee or effectively has one in the lobby even if it’s called something else, then that works just as well. Now, the bad: Mexico City is more than a little seedy. We’ve been very strongly urged not to venture out exploring much beyond the hotels next door because there is a lot of crime there. I think we may be safe in a group, but even so I try to keep alert to what’s going on around me. I learned two things earlier today: 1. 90% of the population of Mexico City has experienced the thrill of being held up at gun-point, and 2. a lot of the citizens always make sure to carry at least a little cash so that when it is their turn to be mugged they at least have a donation available. Or maybe it’s a “don’t shoot me” fee. Another problem is the smell. We went to a flea market – incidentally, I now understand why it’s called a “flea” market – where they sell a lot of pirated DVDs. I thought there was a chance that they might have either “The DaVinci Code” or “X-Men 3” but those were apparently just a little too new. I wouldn’t have bought either of them, just for the record. I can’t imagine that the quality would be terribly good, and I still feel like buying pirated movies would be like stealing from myself. They did have a lot of fairly new releases though. I also discovered smells – none of them good – that I don’t think I believed could even exist. I imagine it’s what Chewbacca was smelling when he jumped into the trash compactor in Star Wars. Maybe worse than that.

The final week of my trip to Mexico City has come and gone. It was actually a much less stressful week than usual. That’s mostly because I was pretty much done with all of my stuff by the time Monday rolled around. I got a couple of “attaboy’s” for my work, which I have to admit I was very proud of. I finally feel like I might be getting the hang of this thing.

Less stressful than usual, however, does not mean stress-free. The VP came into town on Thursday. As usual, he asked questions that I never even thought to ask. I spent most of the day Thursday trying to track down answers for him. I shouldn’t feel too bad though. It’s not like the one’s who reviewed my work thought of them either. And it’s not just me that he has that effect on, I think. He seems to ask a lot of questions that other people don’t think to ask. Perhaps that’s why he’s the boss and we all work for him.

The pre-exit dinner was fun, although just a bit on the long side. The Finance Director picked us up from the hotel at 6:45 and we didn’t return until after 12:30. Huh, I’ve been thinking that it was a five-hour dinner when it was actually almost six. Funny. We had a good time, and it was one of the best meals we had. I think that when you order something and you’re not surprised by the result you’ve had a good meal. Taste and presentation also go along with that, but some of the worst meals I’ve had have been because I was expecting one thing and got another. We had good food and good company. I spent most of the night talking movies and politics. I’m told politics are one of the things you should never talk about when you’re in a foreign country, but it’s not like I was talking about their politics. I was pretty much talking about US politics and agreeing and disagreeing with them on that basis. We didn’t even touch on the upcoming elections for the Mexican Presidency.

After the dinner portion of the evening was over, we sat around the table until they actually asked us to go to the bar and continue there. So we gathered around a little table next to the piano. It must have been late already because I only remember piano guy playing two songs and then bailing. Tequila flowed freely. There were cigars from a country that I’m not allowed to go to. More conversation, of course. Around 11:15 you could kind of tell that everyone hit the wall. Well, almost everyone. I think the Mexico GM could have gone on all night. Everyone else sort of seemed to slow down and you could tell that the thoughts of the American guests were turning towards bed and the unenviable task of packing to go home.

We finally got back to the hotel and I called home. Instead of making it a quick goodnight and gotten to the packing and sleeping, we stayed on the phone for an hour or so. Then I packed and finally got to bed around 3:00am. I didn’t think that was a brilliant idea, since the exit conference the next day was basically going to be the Larry Show. I guess I managed to get the sections with the most problems, so about 75% of the talking was done by your’s truly. I think I came off fairly well. I’m sure some of it could have been better, but either lack of sleep or actual knowledge of the material (not likely) made me a fairly lucid and intelligent speaker. Who knows, maybe I actually am getting better at this.

So now I’m home. I’ve got about a week before I head out again. The good news is that this next trip is the last I’m scheduled for this year, as the schedule currently stands. The bad news is that it’s three weeks long and no coming home on the weekends. Ok, I guess in all fairness I should say that the other bit of good news is that it’s actually in Italy, which I’ve always wanted to go to. I’ve got some plans for the trip, but it remains to be seen if I can manage to do everything I want to do with the time I have available. I’ll keep you posted.

Don’t Cry for me, Argentina – March 27 – April 1

The last week has finally arrived. This is always the most hectic of weeks since we’re trying to finish up as much as we possibly can and prepare for the exit on Friday, so it was truly odd for me to actually be bored most of the week. I actually took on extra work that we had previously decided didn’t need to be done in an effort to keep busy and have something, however meaningless, to do.

I didn’t do anything on the weeknights except go to dinner and avoid the pushers of everything from leather to human flesh, mostly flesh. There was one guy who got a little upset with me because I started telling him “no” as he started crossing the street to get to me and before he had even opened his mouth to start his spiel. I knew I didn’t want his services, so why should I allow him to start pushing them on me? We mostly stayed near the hotel for dinner. The quality of the food was significantly reduced, but the shorter travel time made up for that.

On Wednesday the Veep came out to see the operation and look over our work. I’m reluctant to have him look at my stuff, mostly because I’m still not all that confident with it despite being told over and over that they’re very happy with my work. I just keep quiet and don’t offer up anything. If I’ve done something wrong, I’d rather it be caught in review by the lead auditor on the engagement than by the Veep. He only stayed one day. We had another team in Santiago, Chile that he was going to visit on Thursday. So we went to dinner with the unit’s management that night and had a good time. I really liked the General Manager. Nice guy with a good sense of humor. He was from Mexico, but looked nothing like any Mexican I’ve ever known. He was blonde-haired and blue-eyed with skin almost as white as mine.

Friday finally came and it was good to get everything over with. We had the exit in the morning, but the lead decided that instead of going right back to the hotel and enjoying the rest of our day that we should stay at the office until it closed at 3:30 and tidy up the report. He tidied. I surfed the internet. I would have much rather seen some of the sights of Buenos Aires that I hadn’t got around to yet, but my opinion wasn’t solicited.

Back at the hotel the staff started to get restless. We’d had the GM’s assistant call someone at Marriott and arrange for us to check out at 7:00pm that night, but that wasn’t apparently communicated to either the front desk or the housekeeping staff. Our flight wasn’t scheduled to leave until 10:30 that night, so there’s no way that either of us were going to take our bags with us to the office and drag them around behind us all day until then. Almost as soon we got back to the hotel, the phone started ringing and people started knocking on the door. “Are you checking out today, sir?” and “What time will you be checking out today?” were questions that I had to answer multiple times. I eventually left to go take a walk down Avenida de Florida on last time.

I had a specific agenda for my little stroll down the avenue. I wanted to find one of the leather, Indiana Jones-style hats that I’d seen during my shopping trip. The key was that I wanted to find one in the style I liked at a price I could live with. Unfortunately, I didn’t have a whole lot of luck. I saw several that looked right but the price was too high. I saw some others that had the price I wanted but didn’t look quite like what I was envisioning. Eventually, I found one that was just a couple of dollars off of my target price and was in the style I wanted. I had the clerk all excited that she was going to make a quick sale, and then snatched that happy feeling away from her. I look ridiculous in hats. I think I can pull off a baseball cap, but put a real hat on my head and I just look silly. I tried on this beautiful leather creation and laughed myself silly. I looked like Charlie Brown with a round tray on his head. Give up. Just give up.

I did buy a friend a mate. No, I didn’t find him a woman, that’s something he needs to do on his own. It’s pronounced mah-tay. A mate is the name for both a tea and the cup you drink it out of. It’s a pretty cool looking thing. A fat round bowl with a narrow top and lots of silver (more likely aluminum or steel or some other silvery looking metal based on the price I paid) and a metal straw with a strainer on the end. I think it looks like a good talking piece that he can put on his table. I even gave him a story for it. When I was walking around Bs.As. that first weekend I kept noticing all of these young people carrying these cups around. The way the mate works is that you fill it with the water and then you sprinkle this green herb on top of it. The water swirls around the herbs and it basically forms a tea. The strainer keeps you from drinking the herbs while you’re choking down the drink. I understand it’s an extremely popular drink but that it’s also very bitter. I told some of the people at the office that I would try some, but I never really got around to doing it. I really intended to. Honest.

Anyway, back to the story. I’m walking around, and I see all these people with these bowls filled with herb and a pipe stem sticking out of the top. I’ve been in college, and I’ve hung out with musicians, artists and assorted burn-outs before, so I immediately thought that they were walking around with fully loaded bongs. And it wasn’t just one or two people that were carrying these things around. It was like every 4th or 5th person I saw. Nothing I saw said anything about marijuana being legal in Argentina, and I’m of course thinking like an American, so I just thought that all of these people were flagrantly flaunting the law (in front of a highly visible police presence, I must add) and partaking of a bit of Mary Jane. I finally asked about it on Monday when I got back to the office and got the real story, but it was a couple of days where I thought Argentina’s next generation were just getting high on the streets.

None of the rest of the day is very interesting. We left for the airport at around 7:00. Got to the Admiral’s Club at around 9:00 and waited until it was time to go to the gate. The plane was supposed to leave at 10:30, but we didn’t actually get out of there until more like 11:00. The plane ride was fine. There were a few bumps but nothing to get excited about. We had dinner about an hour into the flight. The film for the evening was “Good Night and Good Luck”, which I was really excited about seeing. I reclined my chair and fixed my eyes firmly on the screen with the intention of finally seeing what was so great about this film. I think I may have made it through 10 minutes. I had the best sleep I’ve ever had on a plane. It was amazing. I must have been exhausted. I got up once around 3am to use the bathroom, but I was pretty much out the whole flight. Wish I could do that every time.

Psst! Buddy! Need a … - March 25 – 26

This being my last weekend in Buenos Aires, possibly ever, I would be a fool to turn down the shopping opportunities that a strong US dollar and a very week Argentinean peso produce. Seriously, the exchange rate is roughly 30 cents per peso. No one in their right mind turns down that kind of value. And I’ve heard that Argentinean leather is supposed to be some of the very best. All I need this weekend is my American Express card and the ability to say “How much?” in Spanish. (For those of you who are interested, it’s “Cuanto cuesta?”)

Saturday started late. I met the boss around 11:30 and we walked over to a section of town called La Recoleta. This is where the cemetery I visited last week was located. I had intended to go over there alone and give it a more thorough look, but that wasn’t in the cards. We ate lunch at a little sidewalk café and talked about the large and loud group of Americans that got themselves a table soon after. We also wondered about the young guy alone with a pitcher of sangria. Apparently it’s pretty powerful stuff. I don’t think I’ve ever had it.

After lunch we wandered past a church and through a flea market. There wasn’t much in there that wasn’t available elsewhere, and it’s not like I had any cash on hand to purchase anything. I was mostly just curious about it. Our first stop of the day after lunch was the Hard Rock Café. Our department director is a former drummer in a Christian rock band, and he likes to get drumsticks from the Hard Rock in every place he visits. He didn’t know that there was a HRC in Bs.As. so we didn’t go last weekend when we were over in the area. I told him I’d get him some sticks before I left. So we stopped at the HRC’s gift shop and I got his sticks and a couple of t-shirts for Lisa and I. We wandered back to the hotel to drop off our bags and then proceeded out onto Avenida de Florida. I don’t know if it’s that I’m not a good shopper with other people or if it was just bad luck, but I couldn’t find anything decent at a price that I felt was right in any of the stores I went to with the boss. We started off in a mall looking around, and everything was just too expensive. I did try on this one blazer style leather jacket that I absolutely loved. It was in this smooth black leather and I looked awesome in it. Unfortunately, it was way more than I was prepared to spend and even if the store had been inclined to negotiate I couldn’t have gotten it down to a reasonable level. They wanted 1600 pesos for it, which translates to a little over $500. I can spend that much for a jacket anywhere in America. I’m not doing it here.

The mall was mostly a bust for me. I did eventually find a wallet that I liked at a price I was willing to go with. I think it cost me about $13 US, and it would probably go for about three times that at home. I’m very pleased with it. I also managed to find a nice purse for either Lisa or my mother, don’t know which yet, that I was pretty satisfied with. We left the mall and went across the street to another little store. Again, no luck on a decent jacket. The boss abandoned me after that one, and I persevered. As soon as I left that little store there was one of these guys handing out cards that asked if I was looking for a leather jacket. Normally, I’d just brush him off, but I was actually looking for a leather jacket. So he gave me his card and pointed out his store and I headed over there. I had another guy from the same store ask me to ditch the card and take his instead, but I told him I didn’t think that would be fair to the first guy. The store was nice, if a little bit crowded. I found a jacket I liked at a price that I was willing to go with. Actually, I found two jackets: one for me and one for Lisa. And I found another purse, again for either her or my mother, across the street. All in all, a fairly successful shopping trip. There is still one item I’m considering, but I just can’t convince myself to pull the trigger on it yet. I’ve seen some leather, Indiana Jones style hats while I’ve been shopping. I think I look pretty ridiculous in hats, but these are just cool. I’m really wanting to go buy one, but would I ever wear it? I’d have to take my jacket along too so that I could make sure to get one that goes with it. They’re available in black, so that’s an option. I just can’t decide.

That was really it for the weekend. I didn’t do any more exploring on Sunday and the shopping took all day Saturday. I felt like I had seen everything I wanted to see, except Café Tortoni but I didn’t remember that until late Sunday night, and I wanted to get some actual rest. I slept late and surfed and watched many episodes of Stargate. I love that show, and I needed to relax.

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It’s off to work I go – March 20-24

There is really not a whole lot you can say about the work week. I get up, go to the office, come back, go to dinner, talk to Lisa, and go to sleep. Usually it’s repeat 5 times, but this week it was only repeat 4 times. In a fortuitous turn of events, the week we arrived in Argentina the government declared a national holiday, presumable to celebrate some military coup in the fairly recent past, for Friday 3/24. So, while Monday through Thursday was the seemingly unending cycle described above, Friday was work from the hotel day. I’m sure you can imagine exactly how much work actually got done.

The boss and I agreed the night before to meet at 11:00 so that he could review some of my work. Actually, he said, “What time to you want to get together to talk about your work papers tomorrow?” on Thursday night. My reply was, “ Don’t even think about knocking on my door before 10:30 unless you want to be hurt. And don’t try calling either; I’m taking my phone off the hook.” Fortunately he didn’t press the issue. I slept in late – very late – and had only just finished getting dressed and turned on the computer when he knocked on my door. Good timing. He invaded my space and made a few minor comments on my work. We decided to get together again at 1:30 for lunch, and he went back to his room. I very quickly made the changes he wanted, which took all of about 10 minutes and proceeded to whip out my DVD player and watch some Stargate SG-1. Stargate was a big player on that workday and in my weekend in general. I kept saying “I intend to do this” or “I intend to do that”, but you know what they say about the road to hell…

Advanced Global Personality Test

Found this while surfing today. Thought it was interesting.

Advanced Global Personality Test Results Extraversion |||||| 30% Stability |||||||||||||||||| 76% Orderliness |||||||||||||||||| 80% Accommodation |||||| 30% Interdependence |||||| 30% Intellectual |||||| 30% Mystical |||||| 30% Artistic |||||||||||||| 56% Religious || 10% Hedonism |||||||||| 36% Materialism |||||||||||||| 56% Narcissism |||||||||||| 50% Adventurousness |||||| 30% Work ethic |||||| 23% Self absorbed |||||||||||||||| 63% Conflict seeking |||||| 23% Need to dominate |||||| 30% Romantic |||||| 30% Avoidant |||||||||||||| 56% Anti-authority |||||||||||||| 56% Wealth |||| 16% Dependency || 10% Change averse |||||||||||||||||| 76% Cautiousness |||||||||||||| 56% Individuality |||||||||| 36% Sexuality |||||||||||| 50% Peter pan complex |||||||||||||||| 70% Physical security |||||||||||||||||| 76% Physical Fitness |||||| 30% Histrionic |||||||||| 36% Paranoia |||||||||||||||| 63% Vanity |||||||||||| 43% Hypersensitivity |||| 16% Female cliche || 10%

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